There were few things that you looked forward to in any given elementary school day: recess, getting to see the cute sixth-grade teacher Mrs. Bull who was a good twenty years your senior, running home from the bus to catch cartoons in the afternoon, and… oh yeah, before it became un-cool to bring your own lunch to school — lunchtime…
I was among the fortunate who were blessed with a new lunchbox every year, and looking back – it was interesting the gimmicks and devices that were used to sell things to us to occupy those lunchboxes year after year.
I’m sure you already know where I’m going with this: Ecto-Cooler.
But bear with me while I build dramatic tension a bit… Gotta give the people what they pay for. Wait; do I get paid for this? Guys? Anyway…
I could wax nostalgic for pages and pages about all the food stuffs that were available for my school lunch as a kid (Dunkaroos, Fruit by the Foot), but from around 1981 to 1990ish, there was a war being fought on the grocery store shelves.
The war to be the sugar water “drink” of choice in kids’ lunchboxes.
Think about it, Hi-C, Kool-Aid, Squeez-It, Capri-Sun, I could go on and on with the options that were available for kids to implore their parents to buy for them. Each, of course, had some sort of a gimmick that set them apart from their competition in the hopes that maybe leading you to obesity or diabetes in pouch form would be more appealing than the other guys.
I remember, as a kid, the “juice” isle stretched as far as the eye could see, with all sorts of juice box, pouch, and bottle options to choose from. It only makes sense that the marketing folks would spend countless dollars to make you identify their brand above all others. (Now, juice boxes are relegated to an end cap or a small shelf next to the “real” juices… interesting, no?).
But while Squeez-It and Capri-Sun had unique packaging that was immediately identifiable, Kool-Aid and Hi-C stuck to the tried and true juice box format. So what could they do to get notice? Kool-Aid opted for awesome advertising with the oft Seth MacFarlane parodied Kool-Aid Man, who became more identifiable than any of the flavored drinks they sold. Plus Kool-Aid devised the genius idea of Kool-Aid points, which you could redeem packages of their juices for “Kool” (nyuck, nyuck) usually Kool-Aid Man themed gear.
Hi-C, on the other hand, had me sold the minute they developed a Ghostbusters themed beverage in Ecto-Cooler.
It’s a pretty genius idea, actually. When you think about it on the simplest level, the drink has absolutely nothing to do with the Ghostbusters property. The first thing that comes to mind when seeing the mucus-like ectoplasm in the Ghostbusters film and in the animated show isn’t “citrus tangerine goodness.” (Unless there’s something the fan community isn’t telling me?) The drink wasn’t even really the same green color as your favorite paranormal entity and mine. But it didn’t matter, the minute they slapped Slimer on the packaging and named the flavor “Ecto-Anything,” it was sold to me.
This is what Star Wars did to us… but I digress…
Having had parents with a strict “milk once a day” rule – Ecto-Cooler at lunch meant that I had to endure drinking low-fat milk for dinner every night, but I didn’t care. It was worth it. Ecto-Cooler made me feel cool. Like I was drinking an officially endorsed drink from the Ghostbusters. No matter what a dweeb I actually was in real life, I was a Ghostbuster at lunch. Which, okay, arguably still made me quite the dweeb. But endearingly so, right? Right?
I would beg and plead with my mom at the grocery store for Ecto-Cooler like a Mogwai wanting a snack after midnight. When Hi-C stated selling two liter cans of their beverages, the thought of cracking open one of those cans gives me more joy than tapping a keg of the finest brew as an adult today. Ecto-Cooler was the drink of choice when friends came to visit, just like scotch is for the suits in their executive offices. “Hey Brian, thanks for coming over, can I offer you an Ecto-Cooler? Boy, did you see Mrs. Bull today?”
It probably makes me beyond shallow, but Ecto-Cooler became associated with childhood, it became associated with a simpler and more enjoyable time. Much like a generation before me drank YooHoo, I drank Ecto-Cooler.
Of course, once the bane of our existence known as “nutrition” became a concern for families everywhere, the portion sizes of Ecto-Cooler slowly diminished. The boxes went from being monolith-sized, to matchbox-sized. Shortly after that, it ceased to be a juice and became a soft drink. It even suddenly became “An Excellent Source of Vitamin-C” (and pure sucrose by the tablespoon, probably) before eventually disappearing completely. It was missed, but life went on as juice boxes gave way eventually to Kool-Aid Koolers, which eventually gave way to it being cool to buy my lunch and drink school sanctioned milk, which gave way to a soda machine in high school, which eventually gave way to… I don’t know… girls.
There was a time around 2002 or 2003ish that Ecto-Cooler made a quiet and understated return, re-themed and renamed Screamin’ Tangerine. And I’m not ashamed to say that I, Troy Benjamin, at that time about to graduate from college, bought juice boxes by the case full. It was all a desperate attempt to take myself back to that moment in my childhood that Ecto-Cooler reminded me of.
Okay, well and when we discovered how good Ecto-Cooler and Vodka combined; it also became a means to inebriation.
But it’s strange to think that a marketing ploy during a highly competitive era where beverage companies were throwing everything at the wall to see what stuck became associated in such ways.
And it’s funny how much I want it back.
(The Private Sector is a weekly syndicated column written by Troy Benjamin presented every Wednesday on Proton Charging, GB Fans, Ghostbusters.net, and Cross the Streams as an op-ed look at the goings on in the world of the Ghostbusters franchise. Learn more about Troy at www.troybenjamin.com)
For more articles about Ecto-Cooler at Proton Charging, click here.
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you can actually still find it, though not from Hi-C. Juicy Juice has a Orange Tangerine flavor that tastes exactly like it. though it’s not green. here’s a bit more about Ecto Cooler from Wikipedia:
Slimer left the box sometime around 1997, but Minute Maid did not discontinue the product until 2001, at which point it was renamed Shoutin’ Orange Tangergreen. Slimer was replaced on the packaging by a similar-looking blob of lips. Except for the flavor, the only other unchanged aspect of the product is that it is still being noted as ecto cool on many store receipts.
In 2006, Shoutin’ Orange Tangergreen was renamed Crazy Citrus Cooler.
In 2007, Crazy Citrus Cooler was discontinued. The formula to make the Ecto Cooler and its counterparts is no longer made.
They failed to mention that Slimer was taken off the packaging at some point when it was still called Ecto Cooler. He was replaced with an orange that had green electron-looking things orbiting it. THEN the name change and the lips.
((Sighs lightly)) Being born in 1990, I truly missed this bit of the Gb’s franchise. Which honestly I think I did have some of the stuff and it tasted funky ((But being that it was probably more than 3 years old or so)).
I do however remember one morning seeing the beginning for an extreme ((I’d later find out the first episode, and maybe 20 seconds of said episode)) Ghostbusters episode. And for the rest of the day I was wondering, “Is it still going on, what’s it about, that was Egon right?”
Now by the time I was seven ((1997)) I’d grown relatively out of the Gb group. Now I was still a fan, but as I’m sure you remember this was before the internet was in every home, and I had no idea what the show was about or that they even made a remake. It was also during the time of VHS where ((Since I was born I think after the show ended)) we had like 10 episodes on dusty VHS I’d long since worn out. And of course it came on where I could watch the first half but if I stayed for the second I’d be late for school.
The Extreme Ghostbusters proved what a part of me had always known. The Ghostbusters would, did, and ALWAYS will Kick ass, and bust some heads ((In a purely metaphysical sense of course)). I bought the toys, I asked my grand mother ((Who ran an agency and didn’t have to be in until 9)) to record each episode.
Now I’m sure it seems I went completely off topic and I kind of did. But I’m trying to say I understand what your saying. We want our childhoods back and by goodness it’s a good time. I think everyone has that one GB thing that they hope for, that will capture out youth’s like a certain green spud shaped ghost in a certain glowy box.
And so I say Troy, I hope you happen to get a call from someone who says they found a crate of the stuff ((After all it’s shelf life is what 500 million years, gotta love Sucrose.)).
I also figure I’ll point out, my two items are the double box set of GB and GB2, both VHS, in a black box, the teaser movie posters on the front, and then each movie in a box that had their respective actual “Movie” posters on it. That was the set I grew up with, the set I wore down. The second/third item is an Extreme Ghostbusters Pack and trap. I can’t tell you how many HOURS I spent “Busting ghosts” and how many holes I made in walls/things I destroyed throwing my trap as I tried to pull off a “Trap slide” worthy of a cartoon show. Stupid friction….
I actually wore the pack to school regularly, and being a large ((I’m just about 7 feet tall now, although I’m 19 and probably weight 100 to 140 pounds at the age of seven)) no one tried to take my pack. If someone did ((As in a teacher)) they’d stop when I’d throw desks. ((Yeah I had anger issues as a kid, Plus a buster never leaves their pack behind, or they get hit with a ghost train)) So I literally probably wore the thing for at least half a school year every day.
I have no doubt that if I every get a fully functioning ((Atleast as far as a prop goes)) Proton pack Mrk. 1 or even Mrk 5 ((The game version I think)) I’d do the same. After all I wear a Ghostbusters hat, belt buckle and arm band every day, what’s a proton pack added to the mix?
You should specify type II diabetes in your article. I am type I and hate how people generalize us as fat obese people by blanketing us all with the “diabetes” label. Rant over.
Yet another great story. We must be around the same age cause everything you just said about the “juice” isle at the grocery store is exactly how I remember. And I can still taste that Ecto-cooler… Dang what I would do for one more tall frosty green glass!! Thank’s for the memories!
@BarT – Interesting about the Juicy Juice. I’ll have to check it out. In regards to the package changes, as always – these columns aren’t meant to be historical records, more like fuzzy memories told in a way to amuse folks.
@Ttrunks – If I get a call from the “top men” in the warehouse holding a crate of Ecto-Cooler, you’ll be the first that I share it with.
@Deetz – Duly noted. Not here to get into political/health/general well-being arguments – most definitely not the point of the article. However, the thinly veiled “obesity and diabetes” (without distinction of type) was a reference to the “reason” that 90% of these items have disappeared from shelves: uninformed parental political correctness (the bane of a lot of childhoods now, I would say).
@ Troy, thanks man, then while we drink the stuff we can sit on my leather couch and watch Ghostbuster’s one on Blue Ray. ((and maybe after a bit of crystal skull added)) we can put in my old VHS tapes.
Hey Troy when I find some. I’ll be sure to drop ya a line, and ship it over Fed Ex Express baby. Heres to what we once had, and what will forever by remembered as the good ol days!
Del.
P.S. we’ll hit that crytal head too, over the phone.
Cool man, loved the article!!
@Troy- yeah, i know. i realized i went too far after i posted. i also failed to see the links to Ecto Cooler related articles at the bottom, but i felt like adding an extra bit as an “in case you wanted more info on the same page” kind of thing.